Never

Never ever ever is anything the way I expect it! That sentence will bother my mom because it's so dramatic and leaves no room for change. But I do love a tidbit of exaggeration every once in a blue moon. Great, now I want a beer. Which actually would be no problem since I'm back in the land where beer is drunk like water! I am daily torn between missing Alaska and wanting to never again be away from my family and wanting to stay and explore here more and more and see every inch of Europe and settle here and make a life for at least a few years. The good thing is, I could very well fail in my efforts to stay here anyways, in which case my decision would be made for me! So I'm going to lay it all out nice and clearly for those who aren't aware of my current life situation:

Last year while I was still in Germany, I happened to chance upon a job opportunity in Cologne and went in for an interview at a company where I would teach Business English. I got the job and the plan has been for me to move back to Germany in May and work there. But I also had in my head to apply at universities here so I could study. So when I arrived a few weeks ago, I applied to a school and took a math test. My hopes are not exponentially high to be completely honest, because this math test involved calculus, everything was in German, and in the middle of the test, my calculator died… soooo that wasn't the best of luck. BUT I tried and I think that is the most important part of anything I do in my life. So I'm waiting to see if I get into the school so that I can decide if I'm taking the job or not and I'm also putting out my feelers for other possibilities in the case that both of my plans fail me. I love having numerous back up plans. Through all the wonderful people I know here, I've been blessed to always have a good roof over my head, a bed, food, and love and encouragement while I try to begin something in a foreign country. I couldn't ask for more and I didn't expect even half of what I've had. It's really so much more than I ever thought. The Heinens are of course the most loving family I could ever dream of having and I couldn't have accomplished all that I have in the past years without them pushing me to achieve more and always having an open door. I am so thankful for them. My dear friend Julia also opened up her living room for me and then told her parents about me, so through a series of events, I now am staying in her old room at her parents house in a small city 15 minutes by train from Cologne. From there, I am more easily able to pursue all my possibilities here in Germany. And let me tell you, they are SO generous! I felt immediately welcomed and comfortable and they showered me with hospitality. I arrived yesterday afternoon and her dad rode his bike so I could ride mine back to the house with them and learn the trail from the train station. Then he made sure I got a new bike lock, fixed my brakes, and is buying a new bed tomorrow for my room. We grilled outside in the garden and ate delicious food together and drank beer and wine and apfelschorle and it was glorious. This morning I helped prepare breakfast and it was of course, simply divine. They've given me a phone and offered to always come pick me up if I'm out late and can't catch a train, and I'm not paying for a thing… the small things matter to me right now, so having free shampoo and towels and lotion, not to mention food and everything all for free.. it's more than I ever imagined and I'm able to look through my options here without giving out all the money I worked for during my time in Alaska. I can't even express how thankful I am. So that's where I'm at right now. Tomorrow I should know if I got into the school, and I'll be speaking with many other people this week about other ideas of what I could do here, so it's going to be an exciting week! It's insanely hot here and I am taking showers daily. (Katie will be happy to hear that!) And I spent a lovely weekend with friends on the sea and barbecuing and other marvelous things. My head is pounding a little since I'm no longer used to drinking beer more than a few times a day, but other than that I'm so so happy! So for now, every day is an adventure to see what happens and what results will come. I'm loving and hating it. But mostly loving it.